Every stable relationship sometimes gets into a boring rut that involves a lot of frustration and isolation. LGBTQ+ people, this is not a straight-exclusive thing! However, while getting a bit bored with your partner is a frequent occurrence, it doesn’t have to happen. So, here are a few simple ways to fix your stale relationship and get that first-date spark back.
Express positive emotions
People are quick to express negative emotions and forget about all the good things that are happening to them. But, don’t forget to give your partner positive feedback which will make them feel more confident and attractive. Even the slightest hint of a compliment can help create a feeling of worthiness and a positive environment.
Expressing positive emotions will also help make you feel good about yourself while giving your love life a boost. In fact, you can make your relationship more enjoyable by simply expressing your positive feelings. Remember to always focus on positive thoughts and feelings of love and happiness. You’ll also feel much better about your relationship which benefits both you and your partner.
Create a joined bucket list
If your average day consists of work and watching TV when you get home, you might want to do something more exciting as a couple. For instance, sit down and create a couple’s bucket list that you’ll go through together. It doesn’t have to contain anything significant like sky diving. Think a bike ride over the weekend, cooking a 3-course meal or traveling to a fun destination.
Try new activities
Doing things together is very important, but doing the same things together over and over again isn’t very fun. So, increase the quality of your relationship by trying something new. For instance, you can take a weekend camping trip and spend some quality time together away from civilization. Spending time in nature is a great way to relax, unwind and have a lot of adventure. But, before you hit the mountains, make sure to get informed. You can always find info at Gear We Are and check out necessary gear and other necessities for your nature activities. You want to have a fun trip, not cut it short because your tent is leaking!
Not only will your joined gym sessions make both of you look super sexy, but they can also improve communication and intimacy. There are even specially created partner exercises you can try—laughs are guaranteed! Working out together will boost you and your partner’s confidence and your self-esteem. Not only will you spend more quality time together, you’ll both end up looking great!
Anyone who gives sex & relationship advice will tell you that it’s important to flirt with your partner. Flirting is fun and it makes us feel giggly and alive. So, just because you’re in a long-term relationship, it doesn’t mean you can’t get your flirt on! Make sure to add a few little spicy remarks into your conversations or try to make your partner laugh. It might feel silly to flirt because you know them for so long, but it works like a charm!
Spice up your sex life
Are you experiencing lesbian bed-death? Is your man not DTF? All of that is normal in relationships. However, don’t let your sex life suffer! One way to spice up your relationship is to turn to your fantasies and try to bring them to life. Get some paper, write your dirty fantasies and take turns picking them off the list. Additionally, many LGBT couples think that sex can only be spontaneous. That’s not true! When you’re super busy, the first thing to suffer is your sex life, so make sure to come up with a fool-proof schedule and stick to it. Sex is the key to relationship satisfaction, so don’t take it for granted!
Stay connected when you’re apart
Let your partner know you’re thinking about them even when they are not around. For instance, send a sneaky e-mail to them saying a few positive words. Sharing your thoughts and feelings about your job or anything that you’re doing is the best way to involve your partner even if you’re apart. Or, you can hit up their phone for a short dirty talk telling them how you feel about them. If your loved one is in the middle of a hard day at work, this will definitely cheer them up and make them flirty when they get home.
Go on a mini date
At the beginning of your relationship, you’ll notice that you’re constantly spending time together. As your relationship grows, and you become more comfortable with each other, it also becomes easier to neglect your partner because you’re busy with work and other things. Are you too tired and busy for a full date with dinner, movies and a walk? Organize a mini date where you meet for lunch or get 30 minutes of one-on-one talk in the evening. Every little thing counts and can make your bond stronger. If you don’t make an effort to spend quality time together, it’s hard to nurture a relationship. So, make it a priority to go on a date each week, even if it’s just quick or simple.
Seek outside help
Oftentimes, being LGBTQ+ can be quite challenging and isolating, especially when you’re not out to the entire world. Luckily, there are great local, national and online communities that can help you get the counseling you need. This way, you can connect with like-minded people, people in the same situation, people who can truly empathize and offer constructive criticism. Also, don’t hesitate to discuss couple’s therapy or turn to a trusted friend for advice (no matter if LGBTQ+ or straight). Sometimes, all you need to feel good and secure in your relationship is to talk about your feelings.
Work on yourself
Do you know what Mother Ru always says? “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love somebody else”! Well, RuPaul is right. Your satisfaction in a relationship is directly connected to your personal satisfaction. Happy people are usually in happy relationships—that’s just how it is. So, work on yourself and your life and let your partner serve as a bonus. Their job is not to make your life great.
Just because you’re facing a hurdle, it doesn’t mean your relationship is over! Practice these smart tips, and you’ll instantly see your relationship get better and more vibrant. Be proud of yourself and your partner!